Dear Jenny from Da Otha’ Block,
I was saddened by the cancellation news about your tour. It was the first time in my life that I could actually afford one of the good seats, a meet and greet, and (I think) a picture with you. Well, I wasn’t happy at that moment but I’m happy to wait for you. I’ll put the dreams of front row JLo, a meet and greet, a pic (and possibly a hair extension) on hold, but they’re not gone. I wish you the very best with your family and your sexy cracka’ husband. (He hot gurrrl- good for you! And even betta for him!)
I hope I don’t have to put them dreams on hold for toooo long, cause what if my luck changes? What if I can’t afford a ticket next year or something like that? (That’s a trauma response for sure… a trauma response can include always waiting for the other shoe to drop. And sometimes I am guilty of it; because that’s what life has shown me. But Palm Springs is proving to be so much more.)
I want to be the opposite kind of voice and energy that you may be reading from haters and critics right now. I want to do for you what you did for me and put love out in your direction. I want to once again say, “Thank you” and “I love you.” They attack you because they hate a beautiful, sexy, smart, and powerful woman. And you’re also brown- so I’m sure that stings them plenty. It’s the Marilyn Monroe effect. They may be late to loving you, like many were with Marilyn, but I’ve always been there. And the future they’ll back and see. And bitch, I’m a fan and I ain’t going nowhere. (and yes…I know ain’t -aint a fuckin word haters).
Our world is a little angry right now… that’s the hate filled spirit that you (we) are up against. But I thank you for putting out love into the universe because I needed it and so many others do too. In fact, you’ve helped carry me through some dark times (you and Mrs. Whitney if you really nasty). So, no matter what they say – there is one person out there in this world who is grateful for you and your whole motha’ fuckin body of work. It filled me with love in times when I didn’t have any for myself. And also, when I did/do, like now. So, thank you.
I loved Atlas and watched it a few times. The last time (Sunday night) was just to say a big “fuck you” to your haters. I sometimes find myself fighting with them on different facebook feeds 😊 LOL! I should stop but they are soo fucking rude and I really hate bullies. (Like Mariah Carey- she’s a rude bitch and bully.) (Sorry – NOT SORRY to one of my client’s life partners who absolutely loves her. I just don’t get down for that kinda of mean bullying. It’s gross.)
Mrs. Better half of the Bennifer, keep doing ALL of it, cause I need ALL of it! It fills my cup and I in turn get to help fill other people’s cups. (And I don’t even mean it in a naughty way cause I do work with mostly gay men and I love a gay guy’s cup that runneth ova. Or straight/questioning guys too.) So, my prayer to the universe is that YOU, Ruples, Christina, Beyonce, Taylor, Cher, Madonna, Dolly, Gaga, Lizzo, Wynonna, Kesha, them Dixie Chicks (and so many others) keep filling my cup and those of the queer community. I have a lot of cups to fill/feel and I mean it in both ways.
Ummm, who cares what they think? Gays are frequently the ones with more disposable income anyway! In fact, after the tour was cancelled, I purchased 4 shirts, 1 vinyl record (for my wall), and a hat. Today, I’m wearing the Hearts and Flowers shirt and I got 2 compliments on it. 😉
Annnnd, last week before the tour was cancelled, I ordered some JLo Beauty products. Loooove the PM eye cream, “That Fresh Take” and the sunscreen, “That Big Screen.” Both are really yummy- applause all the way around! I also got the Beso Balm, which I also love but not as much. It reminds me of the heavy Mac Lip Glass (just lighter), which is great but, I want soft supple “slap my lips with your wiener” kinda lips. I don’t want the wiener to just stick on my lip. *looks side to side* But it is beautiful and I do wear it often when I’m not worried about a dick flapping on my face. (Which seems to be more often than I’d like these days.)
I’d love to see your version of EOS… but just better. I’m so addicted to lip stuff. I used to party with meth when I was young and lost…. So I take the addiction to lippy stuff as a win. Also, I’d love it in an applicator where I don’t have to use my finger. (Gurrrrl, I don’t know where my fingers have been. Do you?) I’d love some lippy that I don’t have to apply every hour. Give me a few hours of suppleness without any need for reapplying- por favor! I flap my lips all day. Some would say toooo much and to them I’d probably give the finger. (Where? I don’t know…do you?)
Whatever you do… music, movies, theater, producing, creating, hosting… wtf ever it is I’m there. I almost got me some Delola money too. I’m still have a poor gay Mexican man’s mentality and am happy to splurge on things that will make me pretty or that will increase the likeliness of a dick slapping my lips, but alcohol is hard to splurge on. There’s a lot of cheaper stuff out there, but I’m sold now on Delola cause it’s JLo. Shit, and if I don’t to the gym soon, I might just get me an Iintimissimi bra too. (Holler when they make gay guy slutty tank tops or underwear. I’ll be there.)
Wishing you and your husband, your family, and your friends just as much happiness as you’ve given me and put out in the world. 😊
In Love,
Your Fan,
Your Fuckin “Leave Britney Alone” Fan,
Your Otha Fat Joe?,
Love Jlee?,
One of Your Biggest Fans (But not in the Yolanda Kinda Way),
Thank You For Giving Love- I Was Looking Everywhere For It Everywhere,
The Happy Homo
PS I’m sure this isn’t the last “Thank You” I have for you. So, until then I wish you the very fucking best in life and a harassment free workplace/life. Everybody deserves that -even me.
PSS Fuck traitor trump and all those we realized aren’t patriots at all. Fuck all of those who would destroy our country, kill our democratic process, instill hate, provoke violence, support a 34 x felon, and lie about the election results. That evil spirit was supposed to die over a half century ago. We have to stand up to it and make sure it never thrives again. Racism, bigotry and corruption cannot be part of America’s future. Our community – especially the queer community needs to vote!
PSSS God Bless America
PSSSS I’m sure people read this and think, “Does that dumb bitch actually think JLo would read this?” And my answer to them is maaaaybe. A gay can dream and get yo’ shade out my shine- hoe. And this is my form of therapy. I get to release what I want into the universe and it’s love. 🙂
PSX5 I hope to catch you in Vegas. And can you make some tank tops for that show? I think I got all the T-shifts available for, “This is Me Now.” Maybe even slutty tank tops? See, we are only allowed to wear so much clothing in the summertime here.
PSX6 Palm Springs I love you. I love most of you- except you Ian. Fuck you. (Yup, I’m still a work in progress but so much better than I used to be.)
PSX7 Jennifer Lopez Affleck what’s next? I’m not going any where, EEEEEEE! Gay man excited squeal!
PSX8 I have a few other stories I wanted to put out there but JLo always comes first. 😉
PSX9 Fuck you bullies- rude ass bitches.
PSX10 Last I looked Atlas was still #1 on Netflix. OMG that eyeball scene!!!!!!!! And it was real!!!!!!
PSX11 I hope that JLo, Ruples, Christina, Beyonce, Taylor, Cher, Madonna, Dolly, Gaga, Lizzo, Wynonna, Kesha, them Dixie Chicks (and so many others) do a combined media blitz to tell America to vote to reelect President Joe Biden. You Queens have the power to evoke action and enlist people to vote! Ya’ll get me to download your music and buy yo’ shit. Get people to turn out the vote. Their art, expression, and livelihoods, like that of queer existence, people of color, Jews, Muslims, and women’s rights are also riding on this election. THIS IS NOT A NORMAL ELECTION. WE NEED TO ACT ACCORDINGLY AND DO EVERYTHING WE CAN TO ENSURE that traitor/criminal loses.
PSX12 Bravo to you … Mr.-Sir- Daddy Pops Robert Fuckin De Niro. *Joyous Manties thrown at your face* for your bravery to speak up for America and what’s right.. (manties = gay man undies-lol possibly assless? A Jock? Whatever you want Sir!) R-E-S-P-E-C-T to you SIR! We are at battle with the devil and I hope you (we) all take up arms (at the ballot box and where ever else they take us) to do what you (we) can to defeat them again (just like they did in the first Civil War). Evil can’t win when there is still soo much good, love, and light in the world. Hopefully there will be no reason to be scared as we move forward- cause we are all in this together and that makes it less scary (at least for me). United we stand or separated we fall. We need to ALL stand together, we are the UNITED States. I love this country and I am pretty sure that I’d die for this country, just like a soldier would fighting an evil enemy that wants to hurt and oppress people.
Soy un Mexican American, and I was raised to love our country. (Public schools get an A +++) God Bless America. And may God open up the eyes of those who were easily fooled by him (the evil traitor and conman) before people give up on the belief in the ballot. Right now we are voting to keep that belief alive. (sounds kinda like a prayer so I’ll add in Jesus name we pray. Also in the name of whomever you turn to for protection, love, and guidance. Santa Muerte, Buddha, Mohammed, Allah, God Almighty and Mother Earth all included. We are going to need all that light to beat all that darkness that is trump.
PSX13 Ooooo I told ya’ll Diddy Did IT blogs ago… believe me now? OOOOooooo
PSX14 JLo it’s the “brown” part about you and being a woman (out of all of the other parts) that makes me so, “JLo is a Goddess.”
