I think Ron had a mini stroke right in front of me last night. Yea, I know that’s a heavy sentence to read. Let me paint the scene…
So earlier today I invited Rhonda Rae out to eat. This was a surprise to me too, especially since our friendship has been on pause for a couple of months. This is only the second time we’ve been to dinner within almost a two-month period and that’s totes an alteration to our norm.
Tonight, I told him my reasons for the friendship break. It’s simple, I don’t feel like I should or need to deal with his children’s bull shit and his at the same time. That’s way too much bull shit! The sending of aggressive violent threats via text messages was just too much. Fuck them people! And I told him I refuse to be subjected to that, ever.
Looksie, I know after he dies, they are going to try and say some shit about me and I’m ready for it. That’s who they are. They’ve already shown their true faces to me, and I don’t have to put up with that behavior. What I was really hoping to achieve with this friendship pause was that he’d realize he needed to go be with his family in Utah (like they wanted). But he isn’t having it and even me putting distance between us didn’t change his mind about leaving Palm Springs. He doesn’t want to leave his home and since I met him, he’s always said the only way he’s leaving his house is with a “toe tag”.
During dinner, I asked him if he knew this whole time that his children thought so poorly of me, and he said yes. I was a bit irritated because he didn’t share that with me before. And I was so nice to them, broke bread with them, and went out of my way to inform them about everything Rhonda Rae. Phone calls, texts, pictures… and it was all to people who didn’t even like me.
Boy, do I feel stupid about it. And ewwwe at me for discounting cold heartless text messages and phone calls and brushing it off as “That’s just her personality.” Like zero pleasantries or salutations and I made excuses for it. I’m so dumb sometimes for believing the best in people but I’m not ready to give up on humanity just yet.
It’s in this conversation when I realized what my problem was… I give each human being the benefit of the doubt, until proven to be a mistake. It was a two-year making excuses for her kind of mistake. I could have totes saved sooo much of my own time and energy had I known they always hated me. But I am the kindhearted sucker who was helping watch their dad for free, so wtf do I know?
Back to our evening…
So, we went to Johnny Costa’s Ristorante in PS. Super yum and I will absolutely go back. And true to form, this crazy old cheap penny-pinching Rhonda Rae never fails to be himself and stuck me with the bill -yet again!
We sat in a booth in a well dimmed dining area. There were cute tall water and bus boys. And the waitress was nice too but took some slight digs in a very covert read between the lines kinda way. I ordered food and a bottle of wine. Yes, I ordered the cheapest bottle of wine because I knew I was footing the bill.
Then this waitress commented in a condescending way, “Look if you are going to bring your old dying sugar daddy to our restaurant don’t order the house wine by the bottle. Order better.” Okay, she didn’t really say that, LOL. She did comment something like, “Well that is the cheapest bottle, it’s the first one on the menu. You only ordered the house wine.” I thought, “OMFG, now I gotta deal with attitude and judgement from the fucking help. ONLY?” I smiled at her and nodded cause I was already sick of correcting people in the restaurant this evening.
Fine, since you asked so nose-a-lee I’ll fucking tell you who I had to correct. Nosey hoe! My first thought was, “You Old White Bitch I don’t need those judging looks at me all night, hoe.” But I didn’t say that.
We were sitting there giggling, talking and enjoying our cheap wine in our booth and minding our own gay business while checking out hot guys as they walked by. Yes, this is totes post Ron mini stroking it and no I don’t mean he was stroking me or himself, like he was post TIA (and I don’t mean a Mexican aunt I mean a transient ischemic attack).
What was I wearing? Well glad you asked….I understood the assignment and I am preaching vote Kamala Harris every chance I get and I was wearing my cute new Harris Walz white t-shirt.
I’m not sure if it was the democrat promoting T shirt someone didn’t like or me looking so cute in it while having dinner with an 84-year-old man. Either way it caught a woman’s attention. Yup, this white Karen lady was sitting at one of the center tables with two men and another woman. One man appeared to be her husband. All 4 were seniors. You’d think her face would be pointing at her company and she’d be engaged in the conversation at her own table, but twas not! Her Karen face and disapproving judging frown and glaring eyes were pointed right at me.
At first, I smiled at her kindly. But she kept glaring, then I smiled even bigger until she turned her face and stopped looking at me. Then yet again I caught that bitch attempting to stare directly into my soul, but she failed to see it and she misread it and me for most of our meal.
The next few times I caught her glaring I did a couple of Glamour Shot poses with kissy duck lips in her direction and that seemed to work and it divert her gaze. The 6th or 7th time, Ron began to look at me like I was crazy. Even post stroking it, Rhonda Rae was paying attention to me, “What are you doing?” And by that point I was thinking the same thing but towards the lady across the way, “What izz she doing? Why this bitch keep trying to stare into my soul?”
I responded to Ron by pressing my chest together with my arms to make moobs and gave that starring lady my best Marilyn shimmy followed by a blown kiss. She watched me in horror and I shimmied until she diverted her gaze. Her company was watching her watch me.
Happily a Sinner,
The Happy Homo
PS Can you believe traitor trump called America a garbage can? OMFG! Gaaayross!
PSS Vote Kamala Harris! And are you tuning in this evening for Beyonce???? EEEEEEee!
PSSS Ooooo… we knew it Elon Musk can’t be trusted. He’s been talking to Putin this whole time, just like traitor trump has. They are Russian assets aimed to destroying our democracy. He’s the immigrant you should be worried about!
