I just got off the phone with my little Mommy. I was out walking Pancho Marie and Genni Lou at the time and kept saying, “You should see this, it’s so beautiful.” I tried to describe the beautiful desert landscape. “I love this… I love this tree… and this bush… and there’s a lemon tree next to a grapefruit tree and then there’s a nopal (cactus) next to a Dr. Seuss pine tree.” I truly think he must have visited Palm Springs before he wrote his books. Everything looks Seuss like to me here. It’s such a beautiful foreign desert land and I’m in love with it. There are plants that look like Bart Simpson’s head, if it were in 3D. Others that don’t look real at all and then you touch it, and their protective thorns poke the fuck out of you. I for one like a good poking but this is different, the plant’s pokin doesn’t feel as good. And I don’t cum.
The hurt from the plant’s thorns is nothing compared to the ant’s fiery hot lasting bite. They seem to be everywhere, red busy fire ants and the little, tiny sugar ants- don’t fuck with them. It sucks to get bit by both of those little fuckers. Their bites are mean and many, their itchy sting stayed with me for over a week. I’ve been putting cortisone cream on my feet every night and there’s hardly any relief. Wear shoes if you are going on long walks. Those fuckers will sting you and your dogs!
I have to admit the Utah mountains are more beautiful but here I don’t have to be subjected to harassment, discrimination and bullying. There’s no one trying to run into me with their shopping carts at the grocery store or calling me a “fag” in parking lots. Utah wasn’t always that way for me. I rather loved it for most of my life. I think after I ran for office, it painted a target on me from the ridiculous traitor trumpers. People became embolden and entitled to say and do whatever the fuck they wanted. People knew I was a gay and even worse they knew I was a democrat. Throw in being a Mexican American and I’m a triple threat. (I also can sing, dance and act but only in the shower.)
When I arrived here, I experienced some extreme culture shock. Instead of people trying to run into me with their shopping carts, men were cruising me in the stores. They were grabbing their dicks at me, and I’d turn around to see if there was anyone behind me. To my surprise there was not! I thought, “Oh shit he means me.” This would happen at Lowes, Walmart, Ralphs, Vons and so many other stores. It was the most beautiful and perverted thing I’d experienced in such a long time. I loved each and everyone of them for making me feel seen (in a positive and welcomed way).
I feel like I’ve had it pretty hard the last few years and it wears on the body. When I arrived, I moved into an Airbnb while I searched for a home to buy. I sat on the balcony of the second-floor unit which looked over the large swimming pool. It was surrounded by grapefruit trees, palm trees and some other beautiful trees I don’t know what they were. When the breeze would blow the flowery dust would fall on me. I thought, “This is my place. Even the trees want to cum on me.”
I must be honest; it has been such a sense of relief being here. For the first month I cried. I cried and then I cried some more. Tears came as I remembered what I just survived, yes it felt like I barley survived with pieces of my spirit having been torn away. Then cried tears of gratitude because I got the fuck out of there in one piece and now, I’m in the gayest place I’ve ever been. Tears of joy are the most healing thing I may have ever experienced. This is the first time in the longest time I’ve been free to be happy and I feel safe. I don’t take that shit for granted.
So, I love this place. I love it for many reasons. It’s away from my Mommy and Utah. Away from the constant prejudice, discrimination, and harassment I knew that was built into most systems there. It is an adorable horny city full of opportunities and beautiful older men.
I remember in one of Jennifer Lopez’s early magazine interviews she said, “The world is my oyster and I’m going to eat it.” Well, I rephrase that, “Palm Springs is my oyster and I’m going to gag, swallow, eat and fuck it.”
