How amazing are the people I got to serve? Well fn AAAAMMMAAAZING! I have my email address out there in the universe and some folks are so resourceful they found it and messaged me. How sweet. You are not supposed to be worrying me- you are supposed to be worrying about yourselves. But, now we can say we’ve all made each other feel better. It warms my heart and soul and I appreciate your concern – I really do.
So much has happened, it is not a healthy place for me to work. I truly love the place, what it stands for and the people it provides an array of services to. (I love the place, not some of the leadership so much. They need help.)
They have denied my ADA accommodation made by their own doctor x2. They asked for a 3rd round of doctor clarification for my ADA accommodation and then didn’t give me time complete their request. I was in communication the entire time with HR and let them know I couldn’t get into the doctor for two months (because they had no appointments available). They asked me to submit a request through my chart and so I did. I talked to my doctor and they were going to find a way to squeeze me in this week to answer the questions for the third time. I told HR that and they quickly denied the ADA request last Friday at 4 PM.
I refuse to hurt myself for them. I told that it physically hurts to do what they were asking me to do and so they retaliated. Which is so weird because the rule is if you have 6 clients a day show up consistently, they wouldn’t schedule me 8. I had 7 for 7 (clients scheduled/arrived) for a while now. Most my clients actually showed up for their appointments, because they can tell I care. If you did a report, which they did weekly, my clients showed up for their appointments.
What a broken clinic, with misguided and vindictive leadership. Our people, you deserve better. It has been terrible to deal with but hopefully they get new management and it resolves itself. Because the place is bigger than any person or anyone director. Abuse, retaliation, ADA recommendations made (over and over), and then denial of ADA accommodations- just so much for one person to try and overcome. So much for me to try and overcome. Their message has been clear. If it wasn’t for the clients, I would have never stuck around. My spirit isn’t broken. It remains… and its hopeful and motivated.
Then I pointed out the possibility of Medicaid/Medicare/insurance fraud last week. The response was there hasn’t been enough training. Weird, the clinic has been there for 3 years?
The week before that, I notified leadership that I had clients that were transferred to me from interns or had seen interns in the past with no notes. They worked for months with these clients (that were transferred to me) and had zero notes. Why was no one watching the students? This isn’t the students fault, this is the fault of leadership. They are students! You are supposed to review their notes! It’s one of the most important things about being a student. You learn no note, no payment. (Who knows how many other clients they have seen that had no notes? Those were just 3 out of the 3 that were transferred to me since I returned.)
It has been a mismanaged clinic well before I arrived. The first bully had made threats to another clinician about, “kicking in their teeth.” I reported everything because if something happens… I will defend myself. Then recently I found out someone is sending tricks to another clinician’s home who spoke out. Tricks at 2 am- terrible. I reported that too.
A past clinician said, “We all knew it was happening in the clinic, you were the only one brave enough to say something.” I will alway speak up to bullying, abuse and fraud. But I am tired of always having to speak up when my own housing and ability to self actualize is at risk for doing so. Why weren’t the bosses’ boss watching? They say see something say something but when you do… you are the bad guy.
I also will kindly speak out when I see an area that could be improved on, but that feedback was always viewed as an attack. It has never been an attack. I came happy and in peace. I have only pointed out the weaknesses in the clinic for the protection of the clinic and its continued existence. It is a vital service that is needed for our people. I hope they do better, I really do.
I couldn’t take anymore pushing me out behavior and after the denial of my ADA accommodation I said I am going to be submitting my resignation, a 2-3 week notice. (So I could wind down services). Then I caught one of my bullies going through my office with my door closed. Ugh, makes me think, how many times have they gone through my things? Gross.
I filed a complaint about that disturbing behavior and was told they wanted me to move up the submission of my resignation to the of the day, Tuesday. They refused to provide a reason, but I believe its cause there is a loose cannon there who continued to violate my boundaries and retaliate against me and she can’t stop if she tried.
This is why they can’t find a new director, because it’s a broken clinic with misguided directives from above. No one likes to go home burnt out. If you burn out your doctors and clinicians – you won’t have any. I hope they get someone really good that fixes everything! Our people deserve that. I really hope that!
Profit over providers- is not a place I want to be. I don’t think, my opinion/experience, they know how to treat their clinicians/doctors and that’s why they have such a high turnover rate. I love the agency for what it is and what it can be. It is such a huge concept that it’s bigger than any one person, it’s about everybody. When I arrived, it really made my heart happy to see such a place existed. I’ve never seen something like it before. A place for people like me, with diangoises like me, and minorities. It made my heart happy- I wanted to be apart of it. I don’t anymore. Its too painful to work there, but I’ll still get my treatment there. Why? Because I believe in it and we all deserve a place like that. We deserve it at it’s best.
I do apologize for not having an opportunity to talk to all my clients. That was terrible to not give me the opportunity to do so. I’m always going to speak up against potential fraud/waste and I will always expect to work in a harassment free work environment; free of retaliation. I also won’t hurt my own body to appease profit/unit driven care, especially when I had appropriate ADA accommodations.
I do truly wish all my clients the best of luck, YOU GOT THIS. It wasn’t me doing the work, it WAS YOU THE WHOLE TIME! Remember social connections and exercise can play a part in your mental health. Be brave and do both. You got this !
I have every intention of doing my own practice. This is my favorite population I have ever worked with in my whole life. I want more of it, but I need it to be safe to do so. When I decided to do it on my own, I said, “What is my intention to do so?” The intention is based in love.
To my clients we… well you deserve much better. I still wish you joy, happiness, and all love you could possibly receive. You are brave and we can do hard things.
Part III is still coming. Haven’t been able to finish it…but she’s coming.
