What a strange week filled with so many feelings. Typically, I love feelings, but these ones were not pleasant. My old buddy, Rhonda Rae and I have been on a hiatus because of he rehired someone I no longer feel comfortable around. And those three weeks have been freeing, uplifting, and full of self-care (by way of the gym).
Recently, that poor guy took a fall after having a bout of delirium caused by a UTI. We live in a retirement community, and UTIs are a common thing for super seniors. UTIs cause confusion and an altered state of consciousness and are precursors for falls. That’s where the real damage can take place. So, if you see your buddy (who is 80+), acting weirder than normal and they’ve had a UTI before, don’t rule it out. Maybe it’s time for a doctor’s visit (with labs).
Here comes the weird part… his daughter lies, lies and lies about me because she doesn’t like me. She thinks I’m after his money, and is “butt hurt” because he didn’t choose to live in Utah where she could be close enough to visit, but still not. Lol She is literally the one who asked me to check in on her father 4 years ago, and help him because he lived alone, depressed, widowed, and was lonely.
Now she’s upset because I am bonded with him. And what the fuck did she think was going to happen when she asked me to care for her dad? Of course I was going to treat him like family, and I did just that. How do you hang out with someone, have fun going out to dinner/drinks/bars and not care about that person? What kind of a monster do they take me for? Or are they projecting? Are they really imagining what they’d do if they were me? We are clearly built differently.
Look, Mexicans have been caring for your families (seniors and children) for a long time. You white folks are sooo busy, too busy for your own families. This isn’t new. What is new for me, is the backlash for actually caring about this guy and treating him pretty fucking good. He literally was the first friend I made out here, so of course he was special to me. But when there is $1 million at stake, the knives and lies come out.
Which is my cue to continue with my plans on getting my life started, getting snatched, and diving into many things here in PS. Taking care of an 83-year-old is a lot of work and not my responsibility. Yes, there’s love, but I’m not capable of doing what he needs, his family should. Fine, you win… you buy his bday cakes, you throw the party, you take him out to dinner…or would that create a will to live, delaying your inheritance? Ewe.
I’ve had 3 weeks to myself… and I am just getting started. What were the weird feelings I mentioned above? Well, I’m glad you asked bitch cause I was just about to tell you. So, after I visited Ronda Rae in the hospital, I went back the next day. I was turned away by the nursing staff as I was placed on a “don’t let in” list and they removed me from being his primary contact here in the desert. I wasn’t even allowed to call and check in to see if he was alive.
After I was refused entrance to his bedside, I could hear a ventilator sound as I walked down the hall, by his room near the elevator. It broke my heart to think I’d broken a promise to him because I was cock blocked by his own daughter. My mind thought he’s on a ventilator dying alone. Her hate for me was stronger than the desire for someone who cares about her dad to be at his bedside. Ewe.
I’ve literally been best friends with this little old man for 4 years. His son in law recently sent messages trying to make me feel like there was something wrong with a 48 year old gay man (who looks 35) being friends with an 83-year-old gay man. Ummm, do they not realize that we live in a retirement community? Am I not supposed to love my neighbor – if they are over a certain age? Hogwash, and ageist thinking if you ask me.
I even called the patient relations office at the hospital because I thought he was literally on his death bed alone, and truly believed there was no one at his bedside. I was carrying around a thick sadness because I’d failed this little old man and had no recourse. So, be careful who you have as your power of attorney and make sure they aren’t selfish cunts who really don’t have your best interests in mind.
That sadness was thankfully lifted. I found out that Rhonda Rae woke up, regained some or all of his cognitive functions, and that his daughter was here from Utah. I thought, “Thank Goddess!” I was relieved not just that he woke up and didn’t die, but because they finally showed up. I’d asked them over and over, during numerous ER visits to come and they never did. I’m glad they are showing up now. I was also glad to hear it wasn’t him on the ventilator but the person in the room next door to him.
My offer still stands for that little old man- despite his evil daughter. His family pushed me to the side and asked me not to contact him anymore, but my offer remains. They are literally trying to turn me into a villain in this situation. Instead of seeing all the love that was there- they see dollars. But that’s part of our queer history, isn’t it? Families come in when people have money and are altered, cut off people that actually care and showed up for the family member, and then deny access to provide the love and support their loved one has been used to for the last 4 years (or whatever).
They’ve even taken it a step further and claimed that I took $45,000 from him. Which I’m still laughing at. Do they even know their dad? You try to get $10 out of that tight wad, much less $45,000 and let me know how that works out for you.
There was a time he did help me out with a vet bill and I’m so glad I took pictures of me paying him back the money, because they are vicious lying people and I knew I needed to “chew, chew, chew, cause they hope I choke”. That picture was me chewing and covering my own ass against greedy family members- because I see who they really are. Just an fyi, that was never anywhere near thousands of dollars. It was a vet bill. I paid back everything I borrowed. I also demonstrated gratitude, which is something they know nothing about. I’m still waiting for my “thank you” from them for loving their dad for 4 years. Maybe there is $45,000 that he gave me that I don’t know about and the check is in the mail? Maybe it’s being stored with the “Thank You” they owe me. I’m sure I’ll get both LOL
I can’t help but make fun of such a shitty situation. For example…
Had that man given me $45,000 I would have given him some bussy, head, and topped his old ass. Shoot, for $20,000 he would have gotten a hand job for sure!!!! Their lies are disgusting and I’m not afraid to talk about it publicly, because I know it’s not true! Where are the receipts? And where is my money?
Well now that he’s not dying… I can resume my own life like I was trying to get started. He’s consumed it for too long. Don’t misinterpret what I’m saying, I gave my time to this man in a loving way. No one forced me. He was my friend, and he really made me laugh for 4 years. He was such an old perv that I enjoyed his company, we checked out soo many men together, and shared meals throughout the week. He is the one who showed me Perez Street. How am I not supposed to care about him? It’s a shame that they don’t think he’s worth having as a friend, or they wouldn’t even question it at all.
They even threatened to call the popo. I said, “Yes, please do! I love the popo!”
Here is how I imagine those calls would go. (Again, I can’t help but make fun of the situation.)
Ring Ring….
Cop Answers- “Police Department.”
Caller- “I’d like to report a crime.”
Cop- Tell me what happened.
Caller- I’d like to report a friendship between an 83-year-old man with a younger man.
Cop- Okay, can you tell me how much younger the other guy is?
Caller- He’s 48 years old but looks 35.
Cop- So, you are reporting a crime between two adults?
Caller- Yes, sir. And he also took him out to go drinking, and sometimes they stumbled and fell.
Cop- So, two consenting adults built a friendship and occasionally drink alcohol and have fun together, is that what you’re saying?
Caller- Exactly!
Cop- You know you are talking about a big part of the population here and 83 year olds are usually happy to spend time with a 48-year-old men, that look 35.
Caller- Well?
Cop- Well, is there anything that’s a crime that happened?
Caller- Well, yes one day my dad told the 48-year-old that looks 35, that he could drive home after drinking and then crashed into a pole, damaging the car of the 48 year old (that looks 35).
Cop- Oh, did that 83-year-old ever pay for those damages he caused? Did he get it fixed?
Caller- No, that would have taken away from everything I expect when he dies!
Cop- Ummmm, bye.
Ring Ring….
Cop Answers- “Police Department.”
Caller- “I’d like to report a crime.”
Cop- Tell me what happened.
Caller- I’d like to report a friendship between an 83-year-old man with younger man.
Cop- Go ahead, what was the crime?
Caller- My dad spent $45,000 over the last 4 years and I’m sure it was because of the younger man.
Cop- How old is that younger man?
Caller- IRL, he’s 48, but you wouldn’t think he’s over 35. He’s got good skin.
Cop- Oh, like he uses JLo Beauty Products?
Caller-Exactly!
Cop- Whether that was a real dollar amount or you pulled it out of thin air…. Is your dad not able to spend his own money?
Caller- Yes, but that is my inheritance!
Cop- Oh, so he’s spending his own money on himself and your mad because you won’t get that money when he dies? Do I have that right?
Caller- Yes, I’m so glad you understand, I feel so heard.
Cop- Did the 48-year-old man that looks 35 ever take any money from your Dad without permission? Without his knowledge? Or steal from you dad, money or otherwise?
Caller- Yes, he does look 35! JLo has good sun screen moisturizer. But no sir to all the other questions.
Cop- Respectfully, go Karen in a different city.
Hangs Up
Ring Ring….
Cop Answers- “Police Department.”
Caller- “I’d like to report a crime.”
Cop- Tell me what happened.
Caller- I’d like to report a REEEEAL GAY friendship between an 83-year-old man and a younger man.
Cop- Under 18?
Caller- No, he’s not a republican. The other guy is 35 years younger though.
*Pause for Calculation*
Cop- You mean to tell me the other gay guy is 48 years old?
Caller- Yes Sir. He’s 48 but looks 35, brown, ethnic, Mexican, maybe black too, and I believe he speaks Spanish. Get him!
Cop- You mean to tell me that you are reporting a friendship between an 83-year-old man and a 48-year-old that looks 35? Hmmmm…goodness, does the 35-year-old looking man make the 83-year-old man pay for everything? That sort of thing usually happens when 83-year-olds hang out with guys who look 35- if they are cute. Is he cute?
Caller- Ugh, he’s a 5 out of 10, with a personality of an 8.
Cop- Does he make the 83-year-old pay for everything? Are you not listening to me?
Caller- Yes, I am listening but I tell you what to do. I do it to everyone! And no the 35-year-old looking 5 rotates paying with him. So it’s usually right down he middle.
Cop- So the 35-year-old looking 5 gay man is not charging for his time? That is weird, but where’s the crime?
Caller- I’m a Karen – GO ARREST HIM BECAUSE I SAID SO, we’ll sort the alternative facts later.
Cop- Bye, Karen
Click
Ready to Start Theee Rest of My Life,
The Happy Homo
PS Old man if you ever read this… and I know you hate to read … I’m here if you need someone at your bedside when death does come. If no one is there- I will be happy to be (just get that in writing). I’ll still honor your wishes with your ashes, but I’m not fighting your family for anything! Be well and I will always love you and hold a special place for you in my heart my old perverted friend. Thank you for your friendship. Thank you for making a scared little gay feel safe in a new city. Thanks for being my safe person. Thank you. Love you. (Don’t worry Rhonda Rae- I can do this… I’m sure I’ve got this.)
